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This page is about Pattaya bar girls and not about Thai women, or girls in Pattaya, in general.
In other words:
Not all Thai women are prostitutes - not even in Pattaya.
Keep this in mind please when dating ordinary Thai women outside Pattaya's bar scene and treat them accordingly.
In other words:
Not all Thai women are prostitutes - not even in Pattaya.
Keep this in mind please when dating ordinary Thai women outside Pattaya's bar scene and treat them accordingly.
1) Bar Girls have been forced into prostitution.
Wrong. Every bar girl you'll meet in Pattaya, has made her own decision for this delicate kind of occupation, and often not even the girls' parents (papa-mama, as they usually say) know the real source of the money their daughters send them every month.
Of course, there are more decent job alternatives upcountry, e.g. in factories, supermarkets etc. As salaries paid in factories, though, are low compared to the potential income of a 'talented' bar girl, who knows how to please her clients (i.e.not only sexually), and the girls, due to their lack of education, can hardly find jobs that pay better, it is, first of all, a financial decision why upcountry girls voluntarily enter the "sex trade". Village girls follow the call of money when they board a bus to Pattaya for the first time.
Also, many new girls have relatives (elder sisters, cousins etc.) or friends from their home village working in Pattaya's bar scene, who invite them to work ('sell pussy') in the same bar.
Unlike in Western countries, no pimps are involved usually, and often the girls' parents would not even guess that their daughters work as prostitutes in Pattaya.
As elsewhere in the world, prostitution is definitely no reputable occupation in Thailand, so many girls will conceal the delicate nature of their income source from their parents and tell them they were working in restaurants or hotels instead.
2) Many Thai Bar Girls are under age.
Wrong. For unexperienced first-time visitors, most Asian women look significantly younger than they are, and it takes a while to get used to the often child-like looks of Pattaya bar girls. Most of these "girls", however, are at least in their twenties (some are even in their fourties already), have been married previously and given birth to at least one child.
Even if you happen to meet a 17-year old girl working as hostess in a beer bar (or along Pattaya Beach road bouvevard), chances she's still a virgin are as low as zero percent. Teen pregnancies are unfortunately quite common in Thailand, and even in the 21st century many Thai girls still get their first children at the age of 15 or 16.
If you should read about (female) underage prostitutes in Pattaya, though, you can be quite sure they haven't been employed in bars frequented by foreign tourists, but in Thai-style Karaoke bars catering mainly to local men, or have plied their trade as freelance hookers on Beach Road.
To judge from the number of foreign paedophiles Pattaya police catch regularly, however, things look different in Pattaya's gay scene, where underage boys seem to be first choice?
3) Bar Girls are getting sexually exploited by Western "sex tourists".
Correct, Pattaya bar girls are getting sexually exploited, that's a part of their job as sex workers. Or, to put it less cynically, Thai bar girls, who have chosen to "sell pussy" (as they like to call it) voluntarily, are getting sexually just as much exploited by so-called "sex tourists", as these "sex tourists" are getting screwed and financially exploited by the girls. (That's the Farang's part in the deal so-to-say.)
In other words, it's a fair trade: sex in exchange for money. After all, this is the reason why both sides, "sex tourists" and bar girls, have come to Pattaya for. And, most importantly, Pattaya bar girls, unlike a majority of Western prostitutes, can choose their customers, even if it may appear the other way round. Which Western prostitute can afford this kind of luxury?
As stated above, there are more respectable jobs available - even for the least educated village girl, and, no matter how low the wages, they're sufficient for living upcountry. The real problem is that a Thai labourer in a factory is getting physically more exploited than the hardest working bar girl in the most thriving short-time bar.
After all, what is the minimum wage in Bangkok? Just above 200 Baht a day. Now how does that compare to a minimum pay of 500 Baht for an hour of "short-time" or 1000 Baht per night? Blame society, globalization, whatever - not the sexual desires of Western men who - neglected by their Western women - fill a financial gap they didn't create themselves.
(By the way: Prostitution in Thailand has a longer tradition than modern-day tourism in Western societies.)
4) Farangs are getting financially exploited by Bar Girls.
Of course, some "love fools", who end up buying houses, motorcycles, cars, and tonnes of Thai gold for their short-term Thai "girlfriends" who they bar-fined in a local beer bar (of course, they've never paid for sex!!), might get seriously exploited financially and sooner or later end up in both a financial and emotional disaster. Yes, there are quite a few guys who got totally screwed by their "loving Thai girlfriends" (aka hookers), and have lost all their savings to a "smart" Pattaya bar girl, who literally ripped them off. Then again, we've all heard these stories before, so nobody can say he hasn't been warned, correct? If someone feels the irresistable urge to send his Thai girlfriend a monthly allowance of US$1,000, build a luxury home in her home village (in her name, of course), buy papa a dozen of water buffaloes, and her brother a brandnew pick-up truck, well, if it all goes wrong, then that's a classic case of som nam na, as they say in Thai ("Tough luck!")
As a matter of fact, most guys simply get what they have come to Pattaya for: sex for money, a fair deal for both sides. Just stick to the basic rules of common sense when getting romantically involved with prostitutes and always remember who they are: prostitutes who get paid for sexual services. If a relationship based on paid sex should develop into a serious love affair, well, that's a bonus. Otherwise remember: "No money - no honey!"
5) Bar Girls do not like their job.
Usually wrong - Pattaya bar girls do enjoy their job. Most ladies already have friends or relatives (elder sisters, cousins etc.) who work in the same bar, so it's easy for "fresh" girls to get used to the job. Those bar girls, who have problems with their special kind of occupation, usually find this out after a couple of days only and leave Pattaya again.
Most girls, however, decide to stay. After all, what is wrong with working in a bar?! Physically it's definitely not a tough job - chatting with punters, enjoying "lady drinks", playing games and going to the fridge occasionally and open a bottle of beer, neither requires a keen intellect nor physical effort. And unless they're busy with their main job assignment, namely to "take care customers", they can chat with each other, watch soap operas on TV or manicure their fingernails.
Most importantly, though, the bar job pays a lot better than an exhausting factory job in Bangkok or Isaan. Although base wages are rather low (roughly 2,000-4,000 Baht per month in a beer bar), girls can increase their wages by earning commissions on lady drinks and bar fines, and bar girls who know "how to do the job", i.e. to the full satisfaction of their clients, can easily make enough money to support their parents and children in the village and make a living for themselves.
As far as the 'sex part' of the bar job is concerned, well, that's a rather difficult question. Do Thai bar girls actually enjoy having sex with clients, apart from the fact that they're getting paid for it? Ten years ago, I would have replied: "Some do, others don't." And quite a few girls (often the best performers, who enjoyed having sex most!) were sometimes willing to spend the whole night with you for free, shagging like two rabbits high on cocaine, and totally enjoyed "it" (provided you were Fun to be with, "halfway" good-looking and knew how to "do your job".)
Nowadays, many Pattaya old-hands might rather have the impression that less bar girls actually enjoy the sex part of their job but simply 'do it for the money'. Unfortunately that's probably right; in the same way as Pattaya has become more "touristy", many bar girls have developed a more professional, i.e. money-oriented attitude, and enjoy their job less than they appeared to do just a decade or two ago. But - thanks Buddha - there are still quite a few bar girls who enjoy getting laid:) You might just have to search a bit longer than in the "good old days" ...
6) Bar Girls earn "big money"
Unfortunately wrong. Even though many good-looking, "talented" and accordingly busy bar girls, especially stunners working in GoGo bars (with relatively high base wages), have the potential to make "big cash", most bar girls simply aren't able to save anything of their monthly earnings; not so much because they actually waste it (some do!) but as the major part of their income is being sent back to their parents and kids upcountry (and 95% or so have at least one child and parents in need of financial support).
Due to Thailand's traditional "social security" system that expects children to support their needy parents, and other financially less 'privileged' or elderly family members, unfortunately even those girls with relatively high wages (and/or "rich" Western "boyfriends"/"sponsors" who regularly send money from overseas) do not become rich women in Pattaya.
7) Bar Girls prefer young men.
Wrong. In general, Thai bar girls prefer older men as their financial situation is secure enough to provide reliable financial support to them on a regular basis, meaning money sent from his home country when he's not in Pattaya.
In addition, older men seem to be under the misconception of displaying less 'butterfly' behaviour than their younger counterparts. Plus, if a girl doesn't enjoy the sex part of her job, an older man (unless he takes Viagra) may mean "less work" for more money.
8) Bar Girls prefer old men.
Wrong. If a good-looking and well-off young guy can offer the same financial support as an elder chap, most bar girls, unless they are looking for a "father figure", prefer young men. Guess why!
9) Bar Girls do not like Thai men.
Usually wrong. Although most girls, who seek a job as hostess in a Pattaya bar, have previously made negative experiences with ex-husbands, or Thai men in general, and are now looking for a Farang boyfriend, it's surprising how many bar girls in Pattaya, especially GoGo girls or younger ones, secretly have Thai boyfriends, some of whom are even getting financially supported by the girls - respectively their unaware Farang "boyfriends". Due diligence is recommended, especially if your 'future bride' is asking for more (and more) money than is "necessary", e.g. if she lives on the village and claims she needs US$1,000 or so a month, you are advised to have a closer look at her good-looking "brother".
10) Pattaya Bar Girls just want your money.
Partly true: Which prostitute in your home country does not want your money?! Do always keep in mind that the girls you happen to meet behind the counters of Pattaya's beer bars, and on the dancing stages of its chrome pole palaces, have, in the first place, come here for only one reaon: to make enough money to support their families, raise their kids, afford a halfway decent lifestyle and possibly meet a potential Farang future husband, who can take care for them financially. If it was not for the money, why should all these pretty girls have come to Pattaya and become what they are effectively: prostitutes.
Then again, money may not be enough to win the heart of a Pattaya bar girl.
As Thai women in general, Pattaya bar girls, too, appreciate polite behaviour and men who smell and dress well. If you haven't taken a shower or changed your clothes in the last 7 days, or have no command of the most basic rules of polite behaviour, then you will probably face a hard time searching for suitable sex partners (or a Thai girlfriend if that's what you're looking for), no matter what a "rich jerk" you may be. Aggressive behaviour, shouting, constant moaning and groaning, being a "cheap Charly" (kee niao) permanently arguing about bills etc. are patterns of behaviour that will definitely not raise your esteem in the eyes of a Thai girl.
11) Thai Bar Girls are submissive.
A definite "No". In fact, most bar girls, just as any other Thai women, are actually very dominant and bossy, extremely jealous, often tetchy, and quickly resort to violent behaviour - e.g. throwing bottles or glasses, when verbal confrontations get out of hand. You can be sure that when having a 'love-affair' with a typical Thai bar girl she's not from the petting zoo, but rather from the monkey house, so-to-say.
Of course, during your holidays you might get a totally different impression and, because you are a paying client and get "first class" treatment for your money, feel like the king himself. In reality, this "light" version is rather trappy as it only reflects the commercial side of Farang-Thai bar girls relationships. Believe me - things do change abruptly when "love affairs" become more "serious" and go beyond the scope of a clear-cut sex worker-sex client relationship.
12) Pattaya Bar Girls are jealous.
A definite "YES". As 99% of all Thai women, Pattaya bar girls, including ex-bar girls, of course, can be extremely jealous. Do not think that just because they are, or have worked as, prostitutes who wouldn't mind going to bed with a married man, or a tourist who "has" a girl from another bar as "girlfriend", they would let you get away with it if you did the same, with another girl in another bar. If you're a "butterfly" who enjoys "fucking around", you might be facing serious problems with "your girl" - even if you've stayed with (=bar-fined) her for only a couple of days and you're not in a proper relationship. If you're in Pattaya only as a tourist, however, and the girl hasn't developed a more profound (financial) interest in you, problems shouldn't be too serious. Just split up, stay on your own for a while (="fuck around"), or look for a girl with a more relaxed attitude.
What is funny in a way: If you take a certain girl from a certain bar, and on the next day want to take another girl from the same bar (they're just prostitutes, you may think - so why should they care?!), Girl no.1 would most likely be jealous and resent both you and her rival - possibly to the extent that Girl No.2 might reject your offer or, in the worst-case scenario, both girls engage in a brawl. So, if you want to change your girl, you may better change the bar, too.
If you have entered a more serious relationship with a (former) bar girl, she'll basically expect the same loyalty of you as if you were her husband. If you still want to enjoy "extramarital activities", you better be careful, i.e. stick to "short-time" bars in distant areas, don't let yourself get "caught in the act", don't give your phone number to other girls etc., as otherwise your 'inofficial Thai wife' might have a serious problem with you and develop symptoms of rabies ...
Arguments may start mildly, with your lady crying and whining (you not love me!), and gradually get nastier: via irrational shouting and scraming (you bullshit me!) to throwing objects (fuck you!) and finally attacking you, in the best case only with her tiny fists ...
To cut a long story short: If you're in Pattaya for a holiday only, especially as a first-time visitor, and don't really need round-the clock escort service (a "girlfriend"), you're probably better off with staying on your own and not sticking to the same lady for a week or so. Instead, go bar-hopping and "sample a little of everthing."
13) Thai Bar Girls are all slim and petite.
Well. In comparison with your average Western madame, if you happen to have one, most Thai women seem to be supersexy, slim and have a wasp waist, right?
As far as the younger GoGo girls are concerned, this first impression may be 100% correct. (By the way, GoGo bars have a natural advantage anyway - You can actually inspect a girl's body in its natural dress before paying her bar fine and taking her back to your hotel room.) Talking about 'average' bar girls in open-air bars, however, the situation is slightly different (as you virtually "buy a pig in a poke".
In fact, from a closer point of view, this means, after you have taken her back to your hotel room and she's finally stripped off her clothes (provided she's left the lights on in this critical moment?), many bar girls actually appear to be less petite than in their fancy bar dress, in other words, they may display a little tummy and seem a bit chubby or pompui nit noi (to say it in Thai).
Fact is that - according to figures released by Thailand's Public Health Ministry in 2008 - 60% of Thai women are overweight (only 20% of Thai men).
Why? Talking about the typical Thai bar girl, and given the fact that 95% or so of them have given birth to at least one child - some even two or three, and often at a relatively tender age - the most obvious reason seems to be their pregnancies. The second reason, of course, are their unhealthy "hobbies": sleep (as long as possible), eat (as often as they can) and drink (whatever, as long as you pay). As a rough rule of thumb one can say: the older a bar girl is, the more children she has and the unhealthier her lifestyle, the "bigger".
No reason to panic or cancel your holidays, though. There are still enough sexy slim Thai girls in Pattaya, who come up to your expectations of petite Thai women, if that's what you like? They're still in the majority, you may just have to search a bit longer than 20 or 30 years ago to find that "perfect body".
Then again, what reflection do most of us see in the mirror? "Sexy men"? Fool if you believe the lips of a bar girl!
14) Thai Bar Girls seriously fall in love with Farangs.
Well, how many prostitutes do fall in love with their clients? Not too many, correct? Then again, as every woman, Thai bar girls have a heart, too, which they're capable of giving away. However, their choice generally depends on the "chosen one's" financial background and his readiness to "take care" for her and her family (e.g. build a house in the village, support her parents, kids etc. financially.)
So, no matter how young, good-looking and sexually potent you may be, do never forget a basic rule: "Money Number One", especially when seeking a long-term partner or future wife.
Then again (as stated above), money may not be enough to win the heart of a Thai bar girl.
15) Bar Girls dream of getting married with Farangs and going abroad.
Not really. Although most Pattaya bar ladies are in search of a foreign boyfriend or husband who can provide regular financial support to them and their families, not so many bar girls are actually keen on going abroad to their home countries - and staying there permanently. A short visit for a maximum of three months or so may be okay for the more "adventurous" and open-minded girls, on the long run, however, most Thai women prefer to stay in their home country.
Why? Strongly attached to their families and Thai culture in general, most Thai girls simply find it hard to get used to living in a Western country and adjust to a different culture. In addition, many bar girls with Farang boyfriends, who don't stay in Thailand permanently (and are more vulnerable to their girlfriends' sweet lies) secretly keep on working in the sex trade, although their generous Farang darlings might have been promised they were staying in the village with their families and kids. Some Thai bar girls even have numerous 'boyfriends' who all support them financially, while each of them may be equally convinced they were the "one and only". Good luck with finding the "love of our life"!
One of the most persistent and controversial misconceptions about Thai bar girls is the next one.
16) Thai Bar Girls are no prostitutes.
Wrong. By definition, every woman who sells her body, sexual services, or - let's rather say - her "companionship" for money, is a prostitute, correct? And the only reason why bar girls do the bar job and "sell pussy" is, first of all, financial. Let's face it, it's the money they've come to Pattaya for, not the great beaches, golf courses, or the prospect of meeting you!
Every Thai girl would naturally, instead of starting a 'career' as bar girl and date foreign men, who can't even speak her native language, understand her culture or mentality, much rather stay with a Thai man somewhere up in the village. It's simply the prospect of making "easy" money, which drives an Isaan rice farmer's daughter to Pattaya or Bangkok. If there, by accidence, she should come across a possible future husband from a Western "Land of milk and honey" (in the opinion of an ordinarily naive bar girl, most Farangs are some kind of quasi-millionaires), well, then that's a welcome side-effect.
From this point of view, bar girls are prostitutes - including your super-dooper "girlfriend" of two or three weeks, who jobbed only as 'waitress' in her bar and is so extraordinarily special and "totally different" from the "other hookers".
Surprisingly, however, hardly any Pattaya bar girl considers herself a prostitute. And, in fact, the entertaining service bar girls in Pattaya provide rather resembles that of a round-the-clock escort service than prostitution as you may know it from Western countries.
A night out in a Pattaya beer bar, in search of a lady for the night, just isn't like going to a brothel for a quickie. Pattaya's beer bars are more like regular pubs back home - just with an abundance of attractive and entertaining hostesses who, in exchange for a fee, are ready to accompany you back to your room and cater for your sexual needs if required.
However, the easy-going, friendly and usually hassle-free atmosphere in Pattaya's bar scene and the "take care" attitude of most girls, might easily give you the false impression you were staying with a regular girlfriend rather than with a prostitute, who's paid for spending her time with a "sexy man" like you. As matter of fact, though, she is getting paid, one way or the other, and now don't you say "I'm not paying her every day", or "My girl never asks me for money", but buy her a thick gold necklace after two weeks of "cheap" company!
Farang - Thai Bar Girl Relationships?
To be fair, relationships between Pattaya bar girls and foreigners may sometimes go beyond the scope of prostitution, develop into true friendships and even "love affairs", based rather on mutual affection than money ("rather" as you will still be expected to support your girl's family financially if you want her to "retire" from the sex trade).
Many Western men are happily married to ex-Pattaya bar girls, who eventually turned into caring partners, housewives or mothers. True love, however, is hard to find, and a famous saying alleges that "it's easy to get a girl out of a bar but impossible to get the bar out of the girl" - meaning that many ex-bar girls may hace enjoyed their job (drinking, dancing, hanging about with friends etc.), the financial rewards for "boom boom" and, possibly, "boom boom" itself too much to make good housewiwes and loyal partners anymore. True in many cases - so think about it well.
No doubt, even relationships between Pattaya bar girls and Western visitors may go beyond the scope of the typical "Sex for Money" or "holiday girlfriend" scheme (a lot might might depend on your own attitude and ambitions!) and, of course, there are more serious ladies out there looking for genuine relationships and, possibly, marriage.
Most bar girls' expectations of a long-term romance, however, are restricted to the prospect of a steady income from a foreign "sponsor", who provides monthly financial support from his faraway home country. So if you really can't help falling in love - do not fall in love too quickly. Take your time, look around; there are thousands of available girls in Pattaya who are all willing to become your special friend of the night and, if you're lucky and serious enough yourself, even more?? All the best, guys!
Last but not least: Do not fall for made-up stories of chronically sick papa-mama and deceased or ill water buffaloes! Be generous if you're happy with "your" lady and her service, but do not let her make a love-fool or a walking ATM of you! A payment of, say, a thousand dollars can easily cure a sick water buffalo for a while; sure enough, though, it would immediately make his fellow buffaloes seriously sick ...
Use your common sense and don't leave your brain at the airport customs!
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Wrong. Every bar girl you'll meet in Pattaya, has made her own decision for this delicate kind of occupation, and often not even the girls' parents (papa-mama, as they usually say) know the real source of the money their daughters send them every month.
Of course, there are more decent job alternatives upcountry, e.g. in factories, supermarkets etc. As salaries paid in factories, though, are low compared to the potential income of a 'talented' bar girl, who knows how to please her clients (i.e.not only sexually), and the girls, due to their lack of education, can hardly find jobs that pay better, it is, first of all, a financial decision why upcountry girls voluntarily enter the "sex trade". Village girls follow the call of money when they board a bus to Pattaya for the first time.
Also, many new girls have relatives (elder sisters, cousins etc.) or friends from their home village working in Pattaya's bar scene, who invite them to work ('sell pussy') in the same bar.
Unlike in Western countries, no pimps are involved usually, and often the girls' parents would not even guess that their daughters work as prostitutes in Pattaya.
As elsewhere in the world, prostitution is definitely no reputable occupation in Thailand, so many girls will conceal the delicate nature of their income source from their parents and tell them they were working in restaurants or hotels instead.
2) Many Thai Bar Girls are under age.
Wrong. For unexperienced first-time visitors, most Asian women look significantly younger than they are, and it takes a while to get used to the often child-like looks of Pattaya bar girls. Most of these "girls", however, are at least in their twenties (some are even in their fourties already), have been married previously and given birth to at least one child.
Even if you happen to meet a 17-year old girl working as hostess in a beer bar (or along Pattaya Beach road bouvevard), chances she's still a virgin are as low as zero percent. Teen pregnancies are unfortunately quite common in Thailand, and even in the 21st century many Thai girls still get their first children at the age of 15 or 16.
If you should read about (female) underage prostitutes in Pattaya, though, you can be quite sure they haven't been employed in bars frequented by foreign tourists, but in Thai-style Karaoke bars catering mainly to local men, or have plied their trade as freelance hookers on Beach Road.
To judge from the number of foreign paedophiles Pattaya police catch regularly, however, things look different in Pattaya's gay scene, where underage boys seem to be first choice?
3) Bar Girls are getting sexually exploited by Western "sex tourists".
Correct, Pattaya bar girls are getting sexually exploited, that's a part of their job as sex workers. Or, to put it less cynically, Thai bar girls, who have chosen to "sell pussy" (as they like to call it) voluntarily, are getting sexually just as much exploited by so-called "sex tourists", as these "sex tourists" are getting screwed and financially exploited by the girls. (That's the Farang's part in the deal so-to-say.)
In other words, it's a fair trade: sex in exchange for money. After all, this is the reason why both sides, "sex tourists" and bar girls, have come to Pattaya for. And, most importantly, Pattaya bar girls, unlike a majority of Western prostitutes, can choose their customers, even if it may appear the other way round. Which Western prostitute can afford this kind of luxury?
As stated above, there are more respectable jobs available - even for the least educated village girl, and, no matter how low the wages, they're sufficient for living upcountry. The real problem is that a Thai labourer in a factory is getting physically more exploited than the hardest working bar girl in the most thriving short-time bar.
After all, what is the minimum wage in Bangkok? Just above 200 Baht a day. Now how does that compare to a minimum pay of 500 Baht for an hour of "short-time" or 1000 Baht per night? Blame society, globalization, whatever - not the sexual desires of Western men who - neglected by their Western women - fill a financial gap they didn't create themselves.
(By the way: Prostitution in Thailand has a longer tradition than modern-day tourism in Western societies.)
4) Farangs are getting financially exploited by Bar Girls.
Of course, some "love fools", who end up buying houses, motorcycles, cars, and tonnes of Thai gold for their short-term Thai "girlfriends" who they bar-fined in a local beer bar (of course, they've never paid for sex!!), might get seriously exploited financially and sooner or later end up in both a financial and emotional disaster. Yes, there are quite a few guys who got totally screwed by their "loving Thai girlfriends" (aka hookers), and have lost all their savings to a "smart" Pattaya bar girl, who literally ripped them off. Then again, we've all heard these stories before, so nobody can say he hasn't been warned, correct? If someone feels the irresistable urge to send his Thai girlfriend a monthly allowance of US$1,000, build a luxury home in her home village (in her name, of course), buy papa a dozen of water buffaloes, and her brother a brandnew pick-up truck, well, if it all goes wrong, then that's a classic case of som nam na, as they say in Thai ("Tough luck!")
As a matter of fact, most guys simply get what they have come to Pattaya for: sex for money, a fair deal for both sides. Just stick to the basic rules of common sense when getting romantically involved with prostitutes and always remember who they are: prostitutes who get paid for sexual services. If a relationship based on paid sex should develop into a serious love affair, well, that's a bonus. Otherwise remember: "No money - no honey!"
5) Bar Girls do not like their job.
Usually wrong - Pattaya bar girls do enjoy their job. Most ladies already have friends or relatives (elder sisters, cousins etc.) who work in the same bar, so it's easy for "fresh" girls to get used to the job. Those bar girls, who have problems with their special kind of occupation, usually find this out after a couple of days only and leave Pattaya again.
Most girls, however, decide to stay. After all, what is wrong with working in a bar?! Physically it's definitely not a tough job - chatting with punters, enjoying "lady drinks", playing games and going to the fridge occasionally and open a bottle of beer, neither requires a keen intellect nor physical effort. And unless they're busy with their main job assignment, namely to "take care customers", they can chat with each other, watch soap operas on TV or manicure their fingernails.
Most importantly, though, the bar job pays a lot better than an exhausting factory job in Bangkok or Isaan. Although base wages are rather low (roughly 2,000-4,000 Baht per month in a beer bar), girls can increase their wages by earning commissions on lady drinks and bar fines, and bar girls who know "how to do the job", i.e. to the full satisfaction of their clients, can easily make enough money to support their parents and children in the village and make a living for themselves.
As far as the 'sex part' of the bar job is concerned, well, that's a rather difficult question. Do Thai bar girls actually enjoy having sex with clients, apart from the fact that they're getting paid for it? Ten years ago, I would have replied: "Some do, others don't." And quite a few girls (often the best performers, who enjoyed having sex most!) were sometimes willing to spend the whole night with you for free, shagging like two rabbits high on cocaine, and totally enjoyed "it" (provided you were Fun to be with, "halfway" good-looking and knew how to "do your job".)
Nowadays, many Pattaya old-hands might rather have the impression that less bar girls actually enjoy the sex part of their job but simply 'do it for the money'. Unfortunately that's probably right; in the same way as Pattaya has become more "touristy", many bar girls have developed a more professional, i.e. money-oriented attitude, and enjoy their job less than they appeared to do just a decade or two ago. But - thanks Buddha - there are still quite a few bar girls who enjoy getting laid:) You might just have to search a bit longer than in the "good old days" ...
6) Bar Girls earn "big money"
Unfortunately wrong. Even though many good-looking, "talented" and accordingly busy bar girls, especially stunners working in GoGo bars (with relatively high base wages), have the potential to make "big cash", most bar girls simply aren't able to save anything of their monthly earnings; not so much because they actually waste it (some do!) but as the major part of their income is being sent back to their parents and kids upcountry (and 95% or so have at least one child and parents in need of financial support).
Due to Thailand's traditional "social security" system that expects children to support their needy parents, and other financially less 'privileged' or elderly family members, unfortunately even those girls with relatively high wages (and/or "rich" Western "boyfriends"/"sponsors" who regularly send money from overseas) do not become rich women in Pattaya.
7) Bar Girls prefer young men.
Wrong. In general, Thai bar girls prefer older men as their financial situation is secure enough to provide reliable financial support to them on a regular basis, meaning money sent from his home country when he's not in Pattaya.
In addition, older men seem to be under the misconception of displaying less 'butterfly' behaviour than their younger counterparts. Plus, if a girl doesn't enjoy the sex part of her job, an older man (unless he takes Viagra) may mean "less work" for more money.
8) Bar Girls prefer old men.
Wrong. If a good-looking and well-off young guy can offer the same financial support as an elder chap, most bar girls, unless they are looking for a "father figure", prefer young men. Guess why!
9) Bar Girls do not like Thai men.
Usually wrong. Although most girls, who seek a job as hostess in a Pattaya bar, have previously made negative experiences with ex-husbands, or Thai men in general, and are now looking for a Farang boyfriend, it's surprising how many bar girls in Pattaya, especially GoGo girls or younger ones, secretly have Thai boyfriends, some of whom are even getting financially supported by the girls - respectively their unaware Farang "boyfriends". Due diligence is recommended, especially if your 'future bride' is asking for more (and more) money than is "necessary", e.g. if she lives on the village and claims she needs US$1,000 or so a month, you are advised to have a closer look at her good-looking "brother".
10) Pattaya Bar Girls just want your money.
Partly true: Which prostitute in your home country does not want your money?! Do always keep in mind that the girls you happen to meet behind the counters of Pattaya's beer bars, and on the dancing stages of its chrome pole palaces, have, in the first place, come here for only one reaon: to make enough money to support their families, raise their kids, afford a halfway decent lifestyle and possibly meet a potential Farang future husband, who can take care for them financially. If it was not for the money, why should all these pretty girls have come to Pattaya and become what they are effectively: prostitutes.
Then again, money may not be enough to win the heart of a Pattaya bar girl.
As Thai women in general, Pattaya bar girls, too, appreciate polite behaviour and men who smell and dress well. If you haven't taken a shower or changed your clothes in the last 7 days, or have no command of the most basic rules of polite behaviour, then you will probably face a hard time searching for suitable sex partners (or a Thai girlfriend if that's what you're looking for), no matter what a "rich jerk" you may be. Aggressive behaviour, shouting, constant moaning and groaning, being a "cheap Charly" (kee niao) permanently arguing about bills etc. are patterns of behaviour that will definitely not raise your esteem in the eyes of a Thai girl.
11) Thai Bar Girls are submissive.
A definite "No". In fact, most bar girls, just as any other Thai women, are actually very dominant and bossy, extremely jealous, often tetchy, and quickly resort to violent behaviour - e.g. throwing bottles or glasses, when verbal confrontations get out of hand. You can be sure that when having a 'love-affair' with a typical Thai bar girl she's not from the petting zoo, but rather from the monkey house, so-to-say.
Of course, during your holidays you might get a totally different impression and, because you are a paying client and get "first class" treatment for your money, feel like the king himself. In reality, this "light" version is rather trappy as it only reflects the commercial side of Farang-Thai bar girls relationships. Believe me - things do change abruptly when "love affairs" become more "serious" and go beyond the scope of a clear-cut sex worker-sex client relationship.
12) Pattaya Bar Girls are jealous.
A definite "YES". As 99% of all Thai women, Pattaya bar girls, including ex-bar girls, of course, can be extremely jealous. Do not think that just because they are, or have worked as, prostitutes who wouldn't mind going to bed with a married man, or a tourist who "has" a girl from another bar as "girlfriend", they would let you get away with it if you did the same, with another girl in another bar. If you're a "butterfly" who enjoys "fucking around", you might be facing serious problems with "your girl" - even if you've stayed with (=bar-fined) her for only a couple of days and you're not in a proper relationship. If you're in Pattaya only as a tourist, however, and the girl hasn't developed a more profound (financial) interest in you, problems shouldn't be too serious. Just split up, stay on your own for a while (="fuck around"), or look for a girl with a more relaxed attitude.
What is funny in a way: If you take a certain girl from a certain bar, and on the next day want to take another girl from the same bar (they're just prostitutes, you may think - so why should they care?!), Girl no.1 would most likely be jealous and resent both you and her rival - possibly to the extent that Girl No.2 might reject your offer or, in the worst-case scenario, both girls engage in a brawl. So, if you want to change your girl, you may better change the bar, too.
If you have entered a more serious relationship with a (former) bar girl, she'll basically expect the same loyalty of you as if you were her husband. If you still want to enjoy "extramarital activities", you better be careful, i.e. stick to "short-time" bars in distant areas, don't let yourself get "caught in the act", don't give your phone number to other girls etc., as otherwise your 'inofficial Thai wife' might have a serious problem with you and develop symptoms of rabies ...
Arguments may start mildly, with your lady crying and whining (you not love me!), and gradually get nastier: via irrational shouting and scraming (you bullshit me!) to throwing objects (fuck you!) and finally attacking you, in the best case only with her tiny fists ...
To cut a long story short: If you're in Pattaya for a holiday only, especially as a first-time visitor, and don't really need round-the clock escort service (a "girlfriend"), you're probably better off with staying on your own and not sticking to the same lady for a week or so. Instead, go bar-hopping and "sample a little of everthing."
13) Thai Bar Girls are all slim and petite.
Well. In comparison with your average Western madame, if you happen to have one, most Thai women seem to be supersexy, slim and have a wasp waist, right?
As far as the younger GoGo girls are concerned, this first impression may be 100% correct. (By the way, GoGo bars have a natural advantage anyway - You can actually inspect a girl's body in its natural dress before paying her bar fine and taking her back to your hotel room.) Talking about 'average' bar girls in open-air bars, however, the situation is slightly different (as you virtually "buy a pig in a poke".
In fact, from a closer point of view, this means, after you have taken her back to your hotel room and she's finally stripped off her clothes (provided she's left the lights on in this critical moment?), many bar girls actually appear to be less petite than in their fancy bar dress, in other words, they may display a little tummy and seem a bit chubby or pompui nit noi (to say it in Thai).
Fact is that - according to figures released by Thailand's Public Health Ministry in 2008 - 60% of Thai women are overweight (only 20% of Thai men).
Why? Talking about the typical Thai bar girl, and given the fact that 95% or so of them have given birth to at least one child - some even two or three, and often at a relatively tender age - the most obvious reason seems to be their pregnancies. The second reason, of course, are their unhealthy "hobbies": sleep (as long as possible), eat (as often as they can) and drink (whatever, as long as you pay). As a rough rule of thumb one can say: the older a bar girl is, the more children she has and the unhealthier her lifestyle, the "bigger".
No reason to panic or cancel your holidays, though. There are still enough sexy slim Thai girls in Pattaya, who come up to your expectations of petite Thai women, if that's what you like? They're still in the majority, you may just have to search a bit longer than 20 or 30 years ago to find that "perfect body".
Then again, what reflection do most of us see in the mirror? "Sexy men"? Fool if you believe the lips of a bar girl!
14) Thai Bar Girls seriously fall in love with Farangs.
Well, how many prostitutes do fall in love with their clients? Not too many, correct? Then again, as every woman, Thai bar girls have a heart, too, which they're capable of giving away. However, their choice generally depends on the "chosen one's" financial background and his readiness to "take care" for her and her family (e.g. build a house in the village, support her parents, kids etc. financially.)
So, no matter how young, good-looking and sexually potent you may be, do never forget a basic rule: "Money Number One", especially when seeking a long-term partner or future wife.
Then again (as stated above), money may not be enough to win the heart of a Thai bar girl.
15) Bar Girls dream of getting married with Farangs and going abroad.
Not really. Although most Pattaya bar ladies are in search of a foreign boyfriend or husband who can provide regular financial support to them and their families, not so many bar girls are actually keen on going abroad to their home countries - and staying there permanently. A short visit for a maximum of three months or so may be okay for the more "adventurous" and open-minded girls, on the long run, however, most Thai women prefer to stay in their home country.
Why? Strongly attached to their families and Thai culture in general, most Thai girls simply find it hard to get used to living in a Western country and adjust to a different culture. In addition, many bar girls with Farang boyfriends, who don't stay in Thailand permanently (and are more vulnerable to their girlfriends' sweet lies) secretly keep on working in the sex trade, although their generous Farang darlings might have been promised they were staying in the village with their families and kids. Some Thai bar girls even have numerous 'boyfriends' who all support them financially, while each of them may be equally convinced they were the "one and only". Good luck with finding the "love of our life"!
One of the most persistent and controversial misconceptions about Thai bar girls is the next one.
16) Thai Bar Girls are no prostitutes.
Wrong. By definition, every woman who sells her body, sexual services, or - let's rather say - her "companionship" for money, is a prostitute, correct? And the only reason why bar girls do the bar job and "sell pussy" is, first of all, financial. Let's face it, it's the money they've come to Pattaya for, not the great beaches, golf courses, or the prospect of meeting you!
Every Thai girl would naturally, instead of starting a 'career' as bar girl and date foreign men, who can't even speak her native language, understand her culture or mentality, much rather stay with a Thai man somewhere up in the village. It's simply the prospect of making "easy" money, which drives an Isaan rice farmer's daughter to Pattaya or Bangkok. If there, by accidence, she should come across a possible future husband from a Western "Land of milk and honey" (in the opinion of an ordinarily naive bar girl, most Farangs are some kind of quasi-millionaires), well, then that's a welcome side-effect.
From this point of view, bar girls are prostitutes - including your super-dooper "girlfriend" of two or three weeks, who jobbed only as 'waitress' in her bar and is so extraordinarily special and "totally different" from the "other hookers".
Surprisingly, however, hardly any Pattaya bar girl considers herself a prostitute. And, in fact, the entertaining service bar girls in Pattaya provide rather resembles that of a round-the-clock escort service than prostitution as you may know it from Western countries.
A night out in a Pattaya beer bar, in search of a lady for the night, just isn't like going to a brothel for a quickie. Pattaya's beer bars are more like regular pubs back home - just with an abundance of attractive and entertaining hostesses who, in exchange for a fee, are ready to accompany you back to your room and cater for your sexual needs if required.
However, the easy-going, friendly and usually hassle-free atmosphere in Pattaya's bar scene and the "take care" attitude of most girls, might easily give you the false impression you were staying with a regular girlfriend rather than with a prostitute, who's paid for spending her time with a "sexy man" like you. As matter of fact, though, she is getting paid, one way or the other, and now don't you say "I'm not paying her every day", or "My girl never asks me for money", but buy her a thick gold necklace after two weeks of "cheap" company!
Farang - Thai Bar Girl Relationships?
To be fair, relationships between Pattaya bar girls and foreigners may sometimes go beyond the scope of prostitution, develop into true friendships and even "love affairs", based rather on mutual affection than money ("rather" as you will still be expected to support your girl's family financially if you want her to "retire" from the sex trade).
Many Western men are happily married to ex-Pattaya bar girls, who eventually turned into caring partners, housewives or mothers. True love, however, is hard to find, and a famous saying alleges that "it's easy to get a girl out of a bar but impossible to get the bar out of the girl" - meaning that many ex-bar girls may hace enjoyed their job (drinking, dancing, hanging about with friends etc.), the financial rewards for "boom boom" and, possibly, "boom boom" itself too much to make good housewiwes and loyal partners anymore. True in many cases - so think about it well.
No doubt, even relationships between Pattaya bar girls and Western visitors may go beyond the scope of the typical "Sex for Money" or "holiday girlfriend" scheme (a lot might might depend on your own attitude and ambitions!) and, of course, there are more serious ladies out there looking for genuine relationships and, possibly, marriage.
Most bar girls' expectations of a long-term romance, however, are restricted to the prospect of a steady income from a foreign "sponsor", who provides monthly financial support from his faraway home country. So if you really can't help falling in love - do not fall in love too quickly. Take your time, look around; there are thousands of available girls in Pattaya who are all willing to become your special friend of the night and, if you're lucky and serious enough yourself, even more?? All the best, guys!
Last but not least: Do not fall for made-up stories of chronically sick papa-mama and deceased or ill water buffaloes! Be generous if you're happy with "your" lady and her service, but do not let her make a love-fool or a walking ATM of you! A payment of, say, a thousand dollars can easily cure a sick water buffalo for a while; sure enough, though, it would immediately make his fellow buffaloes seriously sick ...
Use your common sense and don't leave your brain at the airport customs!
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The Truth About Pattaya Bar Girls
Now how many times have you heard a Pattaya newbie, who just bumped into the 'love of his life' in Pattaya, parrot the following, or similar bullshit?
"My girfriend is different from all the other bar girls", "My lady doesn't love me for my money only" or "My girlfriend has never been a prostitute" ...
Others, misguided by lurid news stories published in the foreign tabloid press, seem to think Thai bar girls were all sexually exploited teenage girls, who have been violently forced into prostitution. What is right, what is wrong? And what is your position as Farang when dealing with Pattaya bar girls - be it as "sex client", two-weeks "boyfriend" or long-term partner?
On this page, we'll look into the most common misconceptions about Pattaya bar girls and some aspects of relationships between bar girls and their "walking wallet" Farang counterparts.
Now how many times have you heard a Pattaya newbie, who just bumped into the 'love of his life' in Pattaya, parrot the following, or similar bullshit?
"My girfriend is different from all the other bar girls", "My lady doesn't love me for my money only" or "My girlfriend has never been a prostitute" ...
Others, misguided by lurid news stories published in the foreign tabloid press, seem to think Thai bar girls were all sexually exploited teenage girls, who have been violently forced into prostitution. What is right, what is wrong? And what is your position as Farang when dealing with Pattaya bar girls - be it as "sex client", two-weeks "boyfriend" or long-term partner?
On this page, we'll look into the most common misconceptions about Pattaya bar girls and some aspects of relationships between bar girls and their "walking wallet" Farang counterparts.
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| Where To Stay? Budget Hotels in Pattaya City |
| Siam Sawasdee Hotel *** Location: Central Pattaya Rates from: $19 |
| Beverly Plaza *** Location: South Pattaya Rates from: $25 |
| Sunshine Hotel *** Location: Central Pattaya Rates from: $25 |
| Sawasdee Pattaya *** Location: Central Pattaya Rates from: $12 More Pattaya Hotels |
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| Where To Stay? Suggested Hotels in South Pattaya |
| Marriott Resort ***** Location: South Pattaya Rates from: $114 |
| Siam Bayshore **** Location: South Pattaya Rates from: $101 |
| Tim Boutique Hotel **** Location: South Pattaya Rates from: $74 |
| Sunbeam Hotel **** Location: Central Pattaya Rates from: $54 More Pattaya Hotels |
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