Taking A Girl Out Of A Bar: Bar Chit-Chat, Lady Drinks Etc.
Okay sexy man, now let's assume you walk along e.g. Soi 8 in Pattaya on a random evening of the year. Hello sexy man! Where you go? or sometimes even an unambigious I want go with you! is shouted at you from every single bar along your way; and Soi 8 is absolutely packed with bars and ladies trying to drag you in! (Let's further assume that between ten and twenty girls work in each venue. Now if you multiply this vague figure by the estimated total number of bars all over Pattaya, you also get a very basic idea of how many "available" girls there are in Funtown.)
Nice sight, all these young exotic chicks competing for your attention, ain't it?! Just don't worry if your possibly low self-esteem or reason can hardly agree with their rating of your incredibly good looks (that you had never been aware of before walking along this narrow sidestreet.) Well, you might be old, bold and fat, so what? Even more reason to enjoy their attention, i.e. as long as you don't really believe you are as "sexy" or "handsome" as they make you believe you are ...
When you've read this page and should indeed stroll along Soi 8, chances that you finally stop at one of the dozens of beer bars and start a chat with one of the hostesses are probably very high. Now don't you expect a sophisticated conversation in perfect Oxford English - just remember that the foreign language skills of the average Isaan rice farmer's daughter are usually rather low. This is also why the notorious Thai bar girl "chit-chat" always samples the same old - and admittedly rather silly - chat-up lines, standard phrases and questions they have picked up from their more experienced co-workers:
Where you from? What my name you? How long you stay Pattaya?
The equally popular standard question What hotel you stay? could be an early hint at a "more profound" (financial) interest in your company, whereas You come Pattaya first time? basically implies that your lady is trying to figure out how much of a greenhorn - and potentially suitable as a human cash machine - you are ...
Sooner or later "your girl" might ask you to buy her a so-called lady drink. Now Pattaya bar girls earn commissions on such "lady drinks" (often orange juice or so), so given the low base wages, there's nothing wrong with buying your girl a lady drink or two (prices are slightly above those of bottled beer and usually approximate 100 Baht in a regular bar). However, you should be careful when a girl pushes you too much or asks you for another lady drink every 15 minutes - the more so if you've replied to her question How many time you come Pattaya? with a telltale "first time."
If you like the special girl you've been chatting with, you may ask her to accompany you back to your room (it's obvious that asking so means sex or boom boom) i.e. unless she's already made her readiness to be your partner of the night clear enough herself: You sleep alone? You no have lady? I like you. You handsome man. I want go with you etc. On the other hand, if this should be your first bar of the night, maybe even during your first-ever visit to Pattaya, you might as well check bin (modern Thai for "Check the bill, please") and have another drink at the bar nextdoor to find out whether the beauty over there is not actually even more beautiful?
Take your time, enjoy yourself; don't fall for the first best girl! Remember, especially as a Pattaya newbie: You're not in a hurry here, there are more than a thousand bars in Pattaya with tens of thousands of sexy bar girls, who are (nearly) all willing to spoil you and be your special friend of the night. Ahhh, decisions decisions ... what a sweet and alluring luxury!!
Bar Fines & How Much To Pay For Sex?
In order to "take a girl out of her bar" - usually for the rest of the night or until the beginning of her next shift - you'll be asked to pay her bar fine. That is the fee charged by the bar for taking one of the service girls out (bar girls generally get paid monthly salaries) and is usually around 300 Baht in a beer bar or roughly 500 to 1,000 Baht in a GoGo bar (bar fines have been skyrocketing in many chrome pole palaces recently and may be even higher for "show girls" and stunners.)
Just remember: You will still have to pay your girl a kind of compensation fee (khaa tua = "body fee" in Thai) for extra sexual services, or simply for the time she's investing in you - even if you shouldn't have sex with her, e.g. if you're too drunk. This money is usually not paid in advance, but after you have had sex or when the girl leaves the next morning. The going rates (always negotiable and depending on high/low season, location of the bar, and the individual expectations of your chosen one) are roughly as follows:
Pattaya Bar Girls: "No Money, No Honey?"
Disneyland for Adults Bar Girl Basics: No Money No Honey Bar Girls vs Freelance Prostitutes
Take a girl out of a bar: Bar Chit-Chat, Lady Drinks etc. Bar Fines & How much to pay for Sex?
Ladyboy Alert! In Your Hotel Room: Extra Charges? Thai Sex Morals HIV/Aids and STDs
Pattaya - Disneyland for Adults!
Pattaya has made huge efforts to upgrade its good old sleazy image in the past decade - away from its infamous "sex image" and tattered reputation as a receptacle for so-called sex tourists, "sexpats" and all sorts of other "perverts," towards upmarket family-friendly "quality" tourism.
But have these efforts been really successful? Or, have the chief strategists of Thailand's tourism authority just been rather naive and presumptuous with their ambitious yet ivory-tower advertising strategies for a new "clean" Pattaya? Honestly - and while acknowledging that Pattaya today can no longer be reduced to its bustling nightlife and sex industry, and the city has continuously managed to attract an ever-increasing number of recreation seekers from all walks of life, including young families and couples - it looks a bit like the latter.
No doubt, Pattaya's sexy bar girls still remain one of the main attractions which Pattaya has on offer for single male tourists from all around the world. Just imagine a completely redesigned "clean" Pattaya without the hundreds of beer bars and A-GoGo clubs and their 20,000 or so bar ladies, lightly-dressed Coyote dancers, ladyboys and freelance hookers - then how many tourists do you think would still opt for Pattaya? Probably significantly less than the 7 million foreign visitors Pattaya has attracted in 2011 (Source: Tourism Authority of Thailand via The Nation).
Thailand may no longer be as cheap as it once used to be, and prices (not only for sexual services) have increased significantly in recent years, while the "quality" of the working girls and their "service-mindedness" may have somewhat declined compared with the "good old days" of pre-mass tourism when "everything was less commercialised" - yet Pattaya is still one of the few destinations in the world where a man can materialise his secret dream of sexy exotic girls at affordable prices or - to quote a good old friend of mine - Disneyland for adults.
So - who are these Pattaya bar girls at all??
If you are interested in dating Thai women outside Pattaya's "cash-oriented" bar scene, and with more serious educational and working backgrounds, please check out our dedicated information page on Thai Dating Sites.
The Truth About Pattaya Bar Girls Pattaya Bars Pattaya GoGo Bars Pattaya Ladyboys
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Long-time - as well as short-time - rates are always negotiable; especially during the low season or when staying with the same girl for a couple of days or weeks. Being negotiable, however, also implies that there's virtually no limit to how much a certain girl could demand for her "special services," especially if you fancy a drop-dead-gorgeous "stunner" from a well attended GoGo bar. In order to avoid an argument with your lady the following morning, or only an hour later, you're advised to always agree on a certain price for sexual services before paying a girl's bar fine, especially with ladies from Gogo bars.
Also please note that many Pattaya bar girls, and especially chrome pole dancers in GoGo bars, have recently developed a "short-time mentality" and might not be very interested in spending the whole night with you - no matter what you've agreed on. The reason for this, of course, is that two or three "short times" a night are more lucrative than a 12-hour "long time" session, and involve less work. And in case her regular bar should be closed already, then there's still a number of discos and after-hours bars in the Walking Street area (e.g. JP bar on Soi Marine Plaza) where bar girls are welcome to operate as freelance hookers after their regular working hours and pick up, maybe, another "walking wallet". (Tip: If you've agreed on "long time," i.e. the girl staying with you all night, and she still insists on "go back bar" after the job is done and your money has changed hands, better don't go and see that girl again as she's obviously not really keen on your company or might even have a boyfriend or other Farang waiting for her. On the other hand, if you've been rude with the girl, demanded "non-standard" sexual practices, or argue about paying a price you've previously agreed on, well, don't be surprised. As the song suggests: Treat her like a lady. Most bar girls, if treated nicely and ladylike, will provide you with an awesome service.)
How To Spot (And Avoid?) Ladyboys in Pattaya
Well, if you watch too many Pattaya-related videos on YouTube you could easily get the false impression that every second bar lady in Pattaya is actually a "chick with a dick." Now that's obviously not true, and ladyboys really make up only probably less than 10% of sex workers in Pattaya. Katoeys (as ladyboys are called in Thai) usually have some kind of designated ladyboy areas where they work and pick up customers interested in "women of the second category" (e.g. a couple of bars on Soi 6/Yodsak and in the Walking Street area), or work as freelance hookers along Pattaya Beach Road. In most "regular" beer bars and Gogo clubs, though, you'll be "safe" from accidentally bar-fining a ladyboy only to end up with an unpleasant surprise when stripping the knickers off your big-busted tall Thai beauty (well, "unpleasant" only if you really have no hidden desires in that direction?) To briefly sum up how to spot a ladyboy in Pattaya's nightlife districts, and what you have to watch out for:
- generally attractive and sexy; slutty dress
- tall, big (silicon) boobs, little arse
- girlish behaviour, exaggerated sexy walk
- dark masculine voice
- less shy, with sometimes "pushy" or slutty behaviour
- wide shoulders, big feet and hands, Adams's Apple
So if you want to avoid accidentally taking a ladyboy back to your room, or if perhaps this should be what you secretly desire, we hope this short check list will help you. For more information on Pattaya's notorious katoeys, how to spot a ladyboy, where to meet ladyboys (or which areas and bars to avoid?) etc. please check out our dedicated Pattaya Ladyboys page.
In Your Hotel Room 1: Extra Charges?
If you stay at a guest house or a low-budget hotel, you will probably not face any problems when taking a female guest back to your room overnight: no extra charges, no silly questions, and the girl won't be required to deposit her ID card at the reception - meaning less costs and hassle, but also less security.
On the other hand, if you stay at an upmarket or more family-oriented hotel, whose management is more concerned about the hotel's image and imposes stricter security policies (many hotels at Jomtien like to promote themselves as "family-friendly") your female overnight guest will probably be asked to leave her ID card or a copy of it at the hotel reception.
While this is for your own security if you should end up in problems (e.g. if you get robbed during your sleep) some upmarket hotels, especially at Jomtien, have the controversial policy to charge you extra for "unregistered guests" - which can mean additional expenses of 300 to 500 Baht per visit to your room. Especially upscale hotels or such that cater to family vacationers may impose this "extra charge" policy and require you to pay a "joiner fee" - others just want to rip you off. (After all, in Thailand you pay for the room, not per person.) Therefore, if you plan on entertaining female guests regularly, you're advised to check in advance, i.e. before booking a room, whether the hotel charges you a joiner fee for such visits as this extra payment may well become a bit expensive on the long run.
In Your Hotel Room 2: Thai Sex Morals ...
Back in your hotel room you'll probably find out that Thai girls have a strong sense of cleanliness and usually take a shower before going to bed with you, and of course they will ask you to take a shower as well. Unless your lady has already been "in business" for a while and discarded her natural shyness, you should also find out now that Thai girls are not only very clean but - believe it or not - also quite shy (regardless of how sexy they may dress in their bars.) That's why the obligatory pre-sex shower is usually to be taken separately! You should not be surprised either if some persuasion is required to make an unexperienced bar girl strip off her towel after the shower. Some may even ask you to switch off the lights, or may not be willing to peel off their towel before they are actually in bed with you and the action starts!
Please also keep in mind that especially new girls "fresh from the village" who have not been bar- fined very often and aren't familiar with "Western sex morals" yet, may often not act very "professionally" between the sheets. As pointed out above, most bar girls have grown up very traditionally, and Thailand's Buddhism-inspired sex morals - at least as officially preached by the defenders of Thai morality in local schools and in the media - are pretty conservative for Western standards. In schools, sex education basically doesn't exist other than in the form of instructions for students not to have sex too early. But of course, in the 21st century, this doesn't stop young people from having sex. This clash, and the obvious incompatibility, of "traditional" cultural values and the reality of the modern world lets Thailand often appear as a land of "sexual hypocrites." Prostitution (same as gambling) is virtually illegal but still exists in every larger village. Premarital sex is "culturally not correct," yet underage pregnancies are continuously on the rise. The lack of effective sex education in Thailand's schools, little knowledge of safer sex techniques, how to prevent unwanted pregnancies etc. of course don't help young Thai girls either when making their first sexual experiences. Whether justified or not, Thai men also have a reputation for being rather lousy and lazy lovers; so many young women fresh from the countryside may have only little experience with more "eccentric" sex practices and have perhaps never had any sexual contacts other than with local men in their villages. It's probably also safe to assume that 99% of the local bar girls have never had sex with a Westerner before moving to Pattaya, while a very large percentage may have never even spoken to a Farang in the real world! Hence, it should be quite intelligible that many bar girls "fresh from the rice farm" are also a bit wary of their first-time sex with a Westerner. However, once they've acquired a taste for it, many bar girls actually often enjoy the sex, naturally even the more so if their foreign clients are not only generous but also young and good-looking. Also remember that sanook ("Fun") is an important concept in Thai culture, and the natural Thai sense of fun is also manifested in their attitude towards sex. So try to be "Fun" when in bed with your girl, make her feel relaxed, and treat her like you would naturally treat your "real" girlfriend, i.e. not a prostitute only temporarily posing as one.
As a rough rule of thumb: Pattaya bar girls are the less shy the longer they have been in the sex trade and the more Farang clients they have served. "Her" experience as a sex worker, as well as your skills of persuasion, also determine her willingness to perform certain sexual practices - e.g. oral or anal sex - which are less common with Thai men.
Condom Alarm! HIV/Aids and Sexually Transmitted Diseases
Last but not least: Unless you fancy an HIV/Aids test back home, it should be self-evident to use a condom when having sex with a Pattaya bar girl. Even if the risk of an HIV infection might not be as high as often reported in the foreign media (unfortunately, no official statistics are available for Pattaya specifically) sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) are "quite common" in Pattaya. Again, no statistics regarding the incedence of STDs among sex workers in Pattaya are available, but well, if you talk to (s)expats who have lived in Pattaya for quite a while and regularly use the services of sex workers, you'll find that quite a few have already contracted one STD or the other during their years in Pattaya. What makes the situation worse and more complicated, is that many girls don't even know they are infected with an STD, or simply might not care, and therefore don't seek medical treatment. And if they do know that they have an STD, this still doesn't necessarily stop them from having unprotected sex with clients. The "money number one" principle also applies here.
It need not be Aids or Hepatitis, a nasty genital fungal infection, Gonorrhoea or a painful Herpes, can be easily transmitted (e.g. Gonorrhoea can also be transmitted through oral sex!) and will definitely spoil your holidays for at least one week. While medication and antibiotics are readily available in local pharmacies and clinics, now who wants to take antibiotics, refrain from drinking alcohol and having sex for a week when on holiday in Pattaya?! Take care.
By the way, according to the latest HIV/Aids statistics from November 2012, Thailand records about 9,470 new HIV infections every year. Since the first case was reported in 1984, nearly 1.2 million Thais have been infected with HIV. About 464,414 of them are still alive and living with HIV/Aids. On a positive note, in 2010, "up to 90% of Thai sex workers were found [to be] using condoms." (Source: The Nation, Bangkok Post)
Bar Girls Explained: The Truth About Pattaya Bar Girls
'Thailand's Doomsday' or What's Wrong with Pattaya's Bar Girl Industry?
Bar Girl Basics: "No Money, No Honey"
First of all - the vast majority of working girls in Pattaya's bars and AGoGo clubs doesn't actually come from Pattaya or the Eastern Seaboard region, but originates from Thailand's northeastern region commonly known as Isaan (or Isan, Esarn etc.)
Traditionally, the Isaan region has always been Thailand's poorest area, rich in cultural heritage but otherwise an only little developed, hardly industrialized rural region between the borderlines of Laos in the North and East, and the old Khmer empire of Cambodia in the South. While infrastructure in the region has increasingly been developed in the past decade, and the rich-poor divide between Isaan and Bangkok or other urban areas in the kingdom has slightly decreased, many Isaan people, especially from rural areas, are still seeking higher-paying work outside the region, particularly in Bangkok. While prostitution is technically illegal in Thailand, and due to traditionally low wages for factory workers in Thailand, many young Isaan women (and men as well) also seek jobs in Thailand's sex industry, often so in Pattaya or other centres of tourism.
Traditionally, the people of Isaan are farmers, so it shouldn't come as a surprise that the average Pattaya bar girl is not a sophisticated college girl but a rice farmer's daughter from remote village areas, who has enjoyed only very little formal education and, in spite of her Western appearance, is actually very traditional (or old-fashioned for Western standards) and - despite "selling pussy" and effectively working as a prostitute - pays high respect to family values.
The average Thai bar girl, no matter how old (and they are usually older than what they look like!) also looks back onto an unhappy history of at least one broken marriage or some disenchanting love affairs with local man, who have transpired to be either alcoholics, wife-beaters, "butterflies" or gamblers, or who are simply too lazy to work. (At least, that's the girls' versions.)
Nearly all bar girls - probably more than 90% - have also given birth to at least one child that has been entrusted in their grandparents' care, meaning that most bar girls you will meet in Pattaya's nightlife areas, no matter how young they may be or appear to be, are actually mothers (single parents) and need to support their children, parents or other family members, financially.
So - given their relatively poor educational background, and the lack of lucrative employment opportunities in their home region - you may now have a guess what all these beautiful young women have come to Pattaya for and "sell pussy"?!
Look for a foreign boyfriend or husband? While this may be a beneficial side-effect for some, first of all, the correct answer is "to make money." No Money No Honey, as bar girls say. In other words, these young women haven't come here to "fuck around," spend their nights in discos (which especially the younger ones may still enjoy of course) or to necessarily meet YOU, but to make a living of their most valuable resource: their body.
Money Number One! then the family and her kids. While a more serious relationship may always be on the horizon, as a tourist "dating" bar girls in Pattaya (always remember you're just paying for their girlfriend-like services!) please accept the fundamental fact that you're not really near the top of the average bar girl's priority list. Love takes time - and usually requires a bit of money. But is that really much different in Western countries?
Bar Girls vs Freelance Prostitutes
When an Isaan village girl has finally made the decision to seek an employment as "sex worker" in Pattaya, she has basically two choices: a) seek a job in a regular beer bar - low base wages, long shifts - or b) work as pole dancer in a GoGo bar, provided she's not too shy to exhibit her body in front of a large male audience and is "easy enough on the eye."
Other girls soon get tired of regular long working hours, or the bossy behaviour of a bar owner or a "mamasan," and decide to ply their trade as freelancers, roaming Pattaya Beach Road at night or hanging about in certain bars, discos and nightclubs on Walking Street - some of whom are notorious for their large clientele of freelance hookers and even seek to attract them with discounted drinks - always in search of a generous guy and a potential "short-time" customer.
Freelance Thai hookers can easily be picked up along the South Pattaya beach promenade or in one of the notorious Walking Street discos that basically operate as "pick-up joints" for freelance girls, e.g. Marine Disco, Lucifer's or Tony's. You should easily spot them there, or they'll just come and chat you up. ("Normal" Thai girls are much less likely to chat up or date foreign guys in Pattaya. And if they do, money or some form of financial compensation is usually still involved or expected in return for granting sexual favours. So if you really seek an affair with a "normal" Thai woman, you'll probably be luckier on dating sites than in Pattaya's discos and nightclubs.)
Obviously, you won't be required to pay a "bar fine" when taking a freelancer back to your room. Unless when picking up Yaba addicts from the beach or so, prices for sexual services however, don't vary significantly from what "regular bar girls" ask for: that's at least 500 Baht or so for a "short-time" session of an hour or so, and about 1,000 Baht for "long time" (all night). Well, and apart from saving the "bar fine", you are not restricted to opening hours of nightspots ...
BUT please note: When you pick up freelance girls and take them back to your room, you might well save a bit of money on "bar fines." But if you end up in trouble, say you get robbed of your money, passport, mobile phone, or other belongings during your sleep - possibly after having been drugged - your chance to find the same girl again somewhere on the streets of Pattaya is basically as low as zero. On the other hand, if you have problems with a girl from a bar, you can always go back to the bar where she works; most venues keep copies of their employees' ID cards and should be able to help you, even if the girl should have left her job and Pattaya.
Take care and don't end up as the main performer in one of these "another foreigner drugged and robbed" stories you can frequently find in the local media and on our news page ...